Mornin’ Brats.. Just wanted to drop a quick howdoyoudo this morning as I choke back the V8 vomit from the remnants of a possibly too much Tangueray evening. Watched KISS KISS BANG BANG.. It was good right up until the part when I stopped paying attention and passed out. Occupational hazard. I’m sure Roger Ebert passes out in a huge sugar coma from time to time as well.
Things have been crazy as usual lately and I’m aware that the old blog has suffered. Not enough self-aggrandizing drunk stories or Humpday Hotties or PreView Reviews, I know. But that’s just the way it goes sometimes kiddos. I’ll try to get around to summing up some stories from the past few weeks soon. There have been some good ones too. There’s been theft, ticketing, towing, Uker and drunken golf, I think.
So until later, I leave you with this plea: Will somebody please get these motherfucking Daryl Hannahs off the motherfucking plane!?!
Thanks,
The Management (Lou)

Not to toot my own horn.. Toot Toot.. But it’s nice to see the million little page views benchmark has been crossed. Keep it up Drunks. I just can’t wait until we get a million visitors. I wasn’t paying close enough attention to find out where page viewer #1,000,000 was from.. oh well. Is it Happy Hour yet?

When I said that my files were unreliable.. I meant it. Not only was I off by a couple days, but I congratulated the wrong freaking guy! Happy Belated Birthday Big George. You are also a essential part of the SIGD team and I apologize for my retardness. I would claim negligence, but I suppose that would be redundant.

P.S. Same idea with these pics. Although I must admit it was harder considering I had to weed through all the Clooney and W pics to find something worthy.
P.P.S. Justus, if you can read this.. When your birthday really does come up, just refer back to your post earlier today.

I think it was a couple days ago, but unfortunately my files, (read: used condom wrappers with crayon scribbled on them) are unreliable so I can’t be sure. Either way, Happy Birthday Bro. Thanks again for all your help with the site when I’m an undependable f*ck.

P.S. Just a couple nice pics I spent all of 3-4 seconds searching for on Googletronster. That’s how much I care, man.
P.P.S. Huh.

Not too eventful Tuesday night.. Went to The Derby to check out this girl DJ who Loco Ohno was trying to hook me up with. It was a good time, but my being the lame ass I’ve recently become, didn’t drink too much, (couple whiskey rocks), didn’t feel like dancing, (there was some hipsters actually video taping a couple of my girls who were breakin’), and of course because I’m the good little worker bee now, I left early before the good weeknight fun was to be had. But oh well, at least I got out of the Crack House for a few hours. And hey, got to take my morning walk with Sweepea to Starbucks and see my little Barista, so it could be a lot worse I suppose. Late.

Hear Ye Hear Ye, Keep your stations tuned in to www.SorryIGotDrunk.com 12:00 Eastern Tizime (9:00AM Pacific Standard Tizime) this Saturday morning.
Los Sorryo De La yo Drunko… PRESENTS
THE 2ND ANNUAL DRAFTS ON DRAFT DAY
That’s right Kiddos and Kiddettes, it is New Years, Christmas, Halloween and Proctology Exam Day all wrapped up into one tightly pounded fist fuck. It is that glorious day known as the NFL Draft MOFO. For those of you drunk enough to recall, Lazlo live blogs the NFL draft in a way that only true crack house regulars can appreciate. You see, sports are mostly about white men who have no athletic talent overcompensating for the fact that they have not athletic talent by drunkenly shouting at the top of their hopps-laden lungs at how much more they know about things that they could not do even with enough PCP in their systems to make Rodney King the winner of that video tape. God Bless America.
With this logic, I claim that draft day is the sports fan drunks “Oh Shit is that my finger up my ass” drunken wet dream. You see, on this most glorious of days, everyone (see LAZLO) is a genius. And no goddamn professional talent evaluator who gets paid millions of dollars because he has a proven track record of knowing what the fuck he is talking about is going tell us different. This day we all are champs. Shit, even in Vegas has my beloved Bears at 100 to 1 odds. Game on.
So, what do we here at SorryIGotDrunk.com do in honor of this great day? Well, you stupid fuck; we drink and drink and drink. Then after that is over and we con Rex into buying some blow, we drink some more.
So here is the deal, Me, Lou, Rex, S.O Mac and Bill are going to drink and entire Keg of beer while watching the NFL draft. We may die, we may pass out and we may end up shitting ourselves but one thing is for sure… we are all full of drunken shit.
So in remembrance of my first foray into the world drunken journalism, we are gonna give you the gulp by gulp starting this Saturday at Noon East Coast Cocktail Time (9AM for those of you crack head West Coasters) I leave you with this. Tell your mom I loved her and let them games begin you sober ass bitch. Let’s get ready to rumble…

Hey kids.. I know it’s been a lil while since I’ve written anything. What can I say? Just haven’t been feeling the flow. (You know, doing the Bull Dance?) I do have a couple stories to catch you all up on, (Tijuana, etc.), and I will get to them. Been working harder and drinkin’ less. I know, I know. I’m not happy about that either.
Just wanted to drop you all a quik hey and say have a Happy Easter, Passover, Tax Day, whatever it is you celebrate this weekend from everyone here at SIGD. Make sure you take a few minutes this weekend to get completely shitty in the honor of whatever idol you worship, even if it is Kelly Pickler. Even more so if it’s that one. We’ll be seein’ you on Monday, thoroughly hungover I’m sure.
As Always,
Mahalo,
Lou

Quick Recap on Weekend:
- Feeling better. Drugs apparently are working. Not that I doubted them. Drugs have always been pretty reliable for me.
- Drank a Hurricane on Saturday.
- Went to Tijuana with Laz, Rex & Bill. (More about that later). May change Bill’s name to Dewey.
- Went to Robot Chicken’s Season Two Premiere Party last night. See: Mila Kunis’ Ass below.
-Mila Kunis kissed me on cheek and we took a pic together, but cell phone fucked me again. (Need Treo ASAP).
- Blacked out sometime around 10:30. Woke up today sans alarm and thought it was Sunday.
- It wasn’t.
- Still drunk. Took cameraphone pic of license plate while drunk driving to work. I realize you can’t read it, but it says LABREWN. Thought it was not only booze-related, but timely since I think UCLA’s hockey team or something is doing well.

- Called Laz during staff meeting to tell him I was still drunk.
- Drunk at work. Oh yeah.
- Fading Fast…