Lois: Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you’re drunk!
Peter: Now that’s not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make
dirty calls to your sister when I’m drunk!
Archive for June 2007
Drunk Quote Of The Day
Friday’s Megan Fox.. Transformers On Monday
I don’t agree with her on the drugs issue, but if I was ever with her I don’t think we’d be talking politics. I’d probably be curled up in the corner like the lil bitch I am. Ha.
To quote Sean Kingston:
You’re way too beautiful girl
Thats why it’ll never work
You’ll have me suicidal, suicidal
When you say it’s over
Damn, all these beautiful girls
They only want to do you dirt
They’ll have you suicidal, suicidal
When they say its over
Jim Carrey To Be A Sorry Drunk
Universal Pictures has set Jim Carrey to star in “Sober Buddies,” a comedy Carrey will produce with Stuber/Parent’s Scott Stuber and Mary Parent and Michael Peyser.
Andrew Kurtzman is writing the script, about a hard-partying software exec assigned a court-appointed Sober Buddy to keep him under control during a critical business trip to Las Vegas. A perfect plan falls apart when the Sober Buddy (Carrey) falls off the wagon.
Kurtzman, who’s writing the DreamWorks pic “Mr. Peabody and Sherman” based on the Jay Ward-created cartoon characters, hatched the project as a pitch with Principal Entertainment’s Danny Sherman, who will be exec producer. They brought it to Carrey, who then took it to Stuber. Stuber set it at Universal under the duo’s overall deal at the studio.
Carrey hasn’t chosen his next film but is zeroing in on the two or three roles he’ll take on before a possible strike next June. The candidates: the title character in the Tim Burton-directed “Ripley’s Believe It or Not!” at Paramount; a gay prison escapee in the dark indie comedy “I Love You Phillip Morris,” written and directed by the “Bad Santa” team of Glenn Ficarra and John Requa; and a reluctant nursemaid to his ailing wife and her family in the Fox comedy “Me Time,” scripted by Ian Roberts and Jay Martel.
[variety]
As SO Mac Would Say.. Piss Drunk Indians
PINE RIDGE, South Dakota (AP) — Tribal police Thursday shut down a volunteer blockade aimed at keeping beer out of the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation, where alcoholism is rampant, and arrested three organizers who refused to leave.
Only a few vehicles had been checked for alcohol by the time Oglala Sioux tribal police told the volunteers to stop because of safety concerns. After several minutes of arguing, police arrested actor and American Indian activist Russell Means; Duane Martin Sr.; and Frank LaMere, a Winnebago activist.
Martin was arrested after it appeared he fought with officers over a spear he was carrying. He spoke in Lakota as more than a half-dozen officers wrestled him to the ground.
The three were arrested on charges of disorderly conduct and obstruction of justice, said tribal police Chief James Twiss.
“You can ask only so long before you have to arrest them and get them into custody,” Twiss said.
“It looked like the violence was initiated by tribal police,” said Mark Vasina of Nebraskans for Peace. His group and Martin’s Strong Heart Civil Rights Movement staged the blockade.
About two dozen people were at Thursday’s blockade, but only four or five actually were stopping vehicles. About half the people there were reporters.
As many as 20 tribal officers were called in to break up the blockade, while about a dozen Nebraska law officers stood by in Whiteclay, a village just outside the 16,500-member reservation.
Alcoholism is rampant on the reservation, which bans alcohol, and the volunteers had hoped the blockade would help curtail bootlegging. Four stores in Whiteclay sell about 4 million cans of beer a year, mostly to American Indians.
John Stamos May Be A Sorry Drunk
Long vid but well worth your time..
P.S. Count the sniffs.. hmm.
Drunk Quote Of The Day
When I was in college, we used to go to Papa Gino’s for All You Can Eat Pasta night, which was fantastic. Anyway, right when we got there one night, I put $5 into the jukebox and just selected that same Rick Astley song over and over again so that it would play for the entire time we were there. The reactions from the diners were priceless. Every time the song ended, you could see people praying that it wouldn’t start again, and then it would. I miss college.
–Bill Simmons
