Archive for April 2005

Keira Knightley Nude Pictures – For Real This Time… NOPE SORRY

keirawhite.jpgSo I’ve been thinking about this all weekend, and my earlier ruse here was no way to start out in building the trust of my readers. So I’m going to live up to my initial empty promise and give you guys the few real topless ones of Keira that I know of. I’ll try and locate the actual drunk nude scene from “The Jacket” as soon as I can. But now it’s you’re turn to start sending in some drunk stories and pics and let’s get this thing going. –Louie.
Thumbs after the jump… (Nudity, obviously)

UPDATE: Google Ads made me take them down. Sorry.

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Sorry Drunks At The Track

Glass.jpgLou here… It’s almost 4 o’clock and that means that Happy Hour is minutes away. This concludes our broadcast day. All of the Sorry Drunks will be at Santa Anita this weekend at the KROQ Microbrew Fest – Drunk on strange tasting local brews and throwing ridiculous amounts of money away on long shot horses because their names are funny. I’ll try to get an adequate buzz on and provide a decent story and some pics for ya’ll next week. And since it is a beer festival, how about a few choice Beer Quotes.
These from Dave Barry:
“I’ve never been into wine. I’m a beer man. What I like about beer is you basically just drink it and order more. You don’t sniff at it, or hold it up to the light and slosh it around, or drone on and on about it, the way people do with wine. Your beer drinker tend to be a straightforward, decent, friendly, down-to-earth person, whereas your serious wine fancier tends to be an insufferable snot.”
“I like beer. On occasion, I will even drink beer to celebrate a major event such as the fall of Communism or the fact that the refrigerator is still working.”
“Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.”

Britney Spears & 50 Cent Eaten By Sharks on American Idol: Internal Revenue Service and Pope John Paul II “No Comment”

yahoograb.jpgLouie here…
On a slow news day, and one that finds me considerably more sober than I’m used to being Friday at work, I’m bored. So I thought I’d once again have a little fun with the yahoo spiders and see what kind of traffic I can muster up for the site. That Keira Knightly naked pic ruse actually got a few people here.
Later…

Fools in April – From LA to SD to TJ and Back Again

drunkstoryicon.jpgLouie here…
Again, a weekend goes flying by and it’s Wednesday before I get around to writing anything about it. And of course, I’m at work, have to keep going into meetings and such and won’t be able to get into a rhythm and this triple mocha will fade quickly into the past. Well, then there’s no time to waste…
There I was, somewhere in San Diego, looking out at the ocean… Swami, I believe the surfers refer to it as. Drunk, on champagne, hearing the team from Champaign, the Illini, beat up on, oh who was it, Louisville or something? Heh. Not quite sure how this whole weekend was or is going after the past 48 hours and knowing that there was at least one more night to come.

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A Few Quotes…

hemingw.jpgFrom Ernest Hemingway:
“Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.”
“An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. ”
“This wine is too good for toast-drinking, my dear. You don’t want to mix emotions up with a wine like that. You lose the taste.”

Breaking News: Obsolete Figurehead for Giant Imaginary Man in the Sky is Dead

pope.jpgI realize this is stretching the whole drunk thing, but I’m sure thousands of Italians will be hitting the vino a little harder today upon finding out that Pope John Paul George Ringo III has passed on.
That’s right, that old Polish guy with his own “Popemobile” has moved on to the great Vatican in the sky. And don’t worry, dear readers, should you wonder whether or not you can use condoms or use stem cells or stay up after 11 to watch Conan or get some fries with that shake, you can always ask me, the most pious of them all. The answer is yes. Except for the condom thing… can’t feel shit.
What a week for dead drunks – Mitch Hedburg (R.I.P), Terri Schiavo (I mean who drinks from a tube, really?), and now the P to the O-P-E.
Up With Dope, Down With Pope.
UPDATE: So now I’m learning that he is, in fact, still alive. No news whether this was a resurrection or just an April Fools stunt by those zany Romans. You know, the ones that are praying for the pope. PRAYING FOR THE POPE. Redundant isn’t a strong enough word. But regardless, the headline stays. He’ll kick the bucket soon enough and then I can get back to my drinking. Heresy, you say? Bah! Hennessey!